Taking off the mask

Taking off the mask

To some people I am a dear friend, to some a relative, to others the older cousin who takes care of them and to my parents a daughter. All this is amongst the several other roles I play in the lives of other people.

A while ago I was having a discussion with my fiancé about being one’s self. What brought it up was the notion that different people in your life may perceive you in different ways. It could then become sort of a balancing act, kind of taking of the mask to be Clark Kent and later transform into Superman.

There are times when I have felt like there were so many facets to my life and it was becoming very tiring. You see I’ve played different roles at different times and situations. I attended a secondary school where in a class of about 36 students, there were about 3 Christians and I was the only female Christian. A lot of times I was hard for me to be myself because they just didn’t get where I was coming from.

Growing up I never really had any close friends who were Christians and even though I had friends at church I was never around long enough to develop a relationship. A few times that I did, I found that these people were not what I expected or thought them to be.

The last few years were a turning point for me, I found myself. I finally decided to be ME. I decided to be true to myself. Being true to myself was the first step to everyone else knowing the real me.

So, here’s a bit about me;

  • I’m the perfect introvert.
  • I love my own company (I’m fun!!!)
  • I’m a cross between a loner and an independent spirit. (This doesn’t mean I don’t want to have friends nor am I a mean person)
  • I love my friends. (I’m a great friend to have, if I may say so myself)
  • I tend to stay on the outside of crowds/groups because, well, I know I don’t always have to fit in.(I’m really not anti-social)
  • I’m a Christian.
  •  I love God and am on a quest for a better relationship with Him.
  • I’m not the best Christian or the purest or the most holy; I am who I am.
  • I pray every day, even if it’s just to say “Thank you Lord”.
  • I try to accept people for who they are and don’t get self righteous.
  • Someone close to me calls me a ‘free spirit’ when it comes to my finances.
  • I carefully control my tongue so I don’t curse.

 This is me; I am Divinely Inspired for Victorious Attitude. 

(*DIVA- from the book The Diva Principle by Michelle McKinney Hammond)

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3 thoughts on “Taking off the mask

  1. I believe something a bit different: You are the sum of your roles.

    Each person you have a relationship with demands something different from you. I am one way with my brother, but another with my boyfriend, and still another with my mother. This is not a juggling act; I am ME no matter who I am with. But the ME changes or alters slightly depending on the person I interact with. I have many qualities – but not all are true all the time. Sometimes I’m confident, sometimes I’m not. I’m quiet, but I know how to be loud. Who I am cannot be limited by words, the concept of ME is fluid and ever changing.

    You still are a dear friend, a relative, an older cousin, a daughter and more. That is probably not something you will ever be able to walk away from. Different people will require different things from you in different situations. You can still be all those things and do it in a way that does not require a juggling act.

    I am glad though, that you have been able to find a way to be true to yourself. It can be an incredibly difficult process, but so worth it in the end.

    1. I like your point about being a sum of all roles and different roles bringing out or requiring different qualities. I understand that.

      For me lately I guess it’s been about people knowing what I’m about and how that affects our relationship.

      I really appreciate your comment, you got me thinking 🙂

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